Stephen Lynch - Down to the old pub instead

^GLad it^Òs your duty t^Do find you a lass with ^Cchild-bearing hips and a ^Dpink supple ass And ^Gmake her you wife and ^Dlove her with love^C so tr^Due Now, some ^Grivers run high some r^Divers run low When her ^Criver runs red then she st^Darting her flow And it^Ò^Gs called menstruation an^Dd heres what I means to ^Cyou ^D You will ^Emnotice her bloomers are ^Cspartie' At first Stand ^Gback, her ovarian ^Ddams gonna burst So ^Emdon^Òt be afraid it's a^C natural thing Just ^Gwind up some cotton and^D give her some string ^CPut the old linens on top of the bed get ^Cout of the house and go d^Down to the old pub

in^Gstead.^{D C D}

She^Òl^Gl retain her water her^D breasts will be tender And ^Cevery third word that you ^Dsay will offend her Get ^Gout of the house and go ^D down to the old pub i^Cnstead ^D And she^Òl^Gl want to make love if you^D do you're a fool Cause you^Òl^Cl only end up with ^Da bloody ol' tool Get ^Gout of the house, dow^Dn to the old pub inste^Cad ^D And she^Òl^Eml want you to sample th^Ce fruit of her loins But ^Gson it^Òll taste like som^De old rusty coins So ^Emturn off the lights boy and ^Ctake off your hat And ^Gdrop to your knees say a p^Drayer to st pat

Then ^Che^Òll give you the strength to get out of the bed And for ^CIreland^Òs sake go^D down to the old pub

in^Gstead.^{D C D}

Now the ^Empub is the place where the ^Clads are a meeting ^GWhen the moon^Òs full and th^De girls are a bleatin The ^Emcatholic, the protestant e^Cven the pagan The ^Gpub is the place when lady ^Dis raggin So ^Cdrink of your pint boys and thank your shamrocks That as ^Cmen folk we don^Òt have to bleed from our cocks And that ^Cwe can escape from the lady in red And get ^Cout of the house and go ^Ddown to the old pub