Capo: 1 Tuning:

The chords/lyrics are from this version of the song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0frM_1VQ1tQ For this particular version they play with capo on 1st, but depending on the version it can be played with capo on 2nd or with no capo like on their new album "Secretions". The chords between { } you strum each strings separately. The chords between [ ] you only strum once. For these parts in the chorus: [It’s/ [ rejected/ It’s/ desperate/ So] wasted] First time, you play the first line, second time... Thanks to raw_sugar80, I started from his version. You can see it here: http://tabs.ultimate-guitar.com/g/garfunkel_and_oates/self_esteem_crd.htm Garfunkel and Oates - Self Esteem

^CYou text at th^Free in the morning ^Dsus2 And you miss^Gpell my name ^C You’ve slept with ^Fhalf my friends on Facebook^Dsus2 And most of them^G think you are ^Clame

You say that wi^Fth me it’s different ^Dsus2 And you’re not ^Gthat big of a ^Cdick And if you disap^Fpear it’s cause you’re busy ^Dsus2 Not cause you’re ^Gwith some other ^Amchick

{Prechorus:

I know that ^Emthis might be ^Amuncouth Em G [ G ] But I’ve decided to tell you the truth]

[Chorus:

^CMy self esteem’s not ^Flow enough to date you ^Dsus2 [It’s/ close, but ^Gnot quite there It’s/ So] ^C Give me time to get a ^Flittle more [ rejected/ ^Dsus2 desperate/ wasted] And you and I can ^Gmake an awesome ^Cpair ^F ^Dsus2 A totally awesome pair]

^CI seem like ^Fyour perfect target ^Dsus2 Like I’ve been ^Glonely for too ^Clong You think I haven’t had ^Fsex in forever ^Dsus2 And I’ll ad^Gmit that you’re not w^Crong

But I would r^Father have no one ^Dsus2 Than this crap l^Get me reaffirm^C I wouldn’t touch your d^Fick if I’d been poisoned ^Dsus2 And the antidote^G was in your s^Amperm

[Prechorus + Chorus] Bridge:

^FThanks for not even pre^Ctending to respect me Or ^Fslightly acknowledging how ^Cmean this is F [ C G C ] Cause what’s easy to find is a loving relationship What’s ^Ghard for a girl like ^Gme to find is ^G peni^Gses

[ G ] Especially when I’m on the road [ G ] Or anywhere, really [ G ] Cause I’m a girl, hello [ G ] That’s kind of how it goes

^FLove is illusive ^Cand impossible But ^Fdicks are available ^Ceverywhere F [ C G C ] So sorry if I don’t feel super lucky To get a ^Gpenis likes yours at^Gtached to a man who ^Gcan’t even pretend to ^Gcare

[ G ] Maybe if something goes horribly awry [ G ] And I think I'll never find a better guy [ G G ] But for now

For ^Gnow ^G [Chorus]

If you want to play like the ukulele on your guitar, put a capo on 5th, transpose to -5 and play only the 4 highest-pitched strings. So the chords would be: Guitar= Ukulele [on the guitar with capo on 5th] C = G [xx0003] F = C [xx2010] Dsus2 = Asus2 [xx2200] G = D [xx0232] Am = Em [xx2000] Em = Bm [xx0432] or [xx4432] If you think something is not right, say it in the comments, but please don't be to harsh, it's my first chords sheet.

Garfunkel and Oates - Self esteem