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Capo: 3 Tuning: E A D G B E
[Verse 1]
CVenus must have dAmrifted just a E7Bit too far from sFhore-- She sunk her little Goyster ship And G7skinny dipped On dFown to the ocean fGloor G7
[Chorus 1]
CTrue love ain't for Amyou, love And if E7marriage is an instiFtution GMine'll have walls with G7cushions So how's about an oFld fashioned handhabung GHere on the futon? G7
[Verse 2]
CArchibald AsAmsholebroke pulled off E7Many high-profile aFntics Like the Gtime he walked outta the tG7ruck stop latrine With a maFchine that was essential To our dGating scene
CArchie kept it Amstarchy For he wE7ore 35 at a Ftime And when his Gchippy stopped her heavy G7breathing Archibald could Fnever unwind Cuz he was bGusy unsheathing...G7
[Verse 3]
CMaybelle shook her Amsleighbell Betwixt Jack E7Frost and a frozen Fhay bale Mr GFrost got his iceberg G7tossed And then he Ftold Miss May That she was Gfree to get lostG7
CFeeling quite canAmtankerous Maybelle dE7ropped him in an Ice cream Fmaker, thus Proving what they Gsay about scorning G7a lady-- And nFow Jack Frost is a Gsnowball in Hades (G7buh-buh-buh-bum)
[Chorus 2]
CTrue love ain't for E7you, love Oh, boo-Amhoo love, it's so gFruesome But you Gcan't do nuthin' So you G7best do someone Whom tFrue love Gain't for, Ctoo Because Ftrue love Gain't for Cyou