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INTRO/RIFF Abm VERSE 1
WhAbmo's that waddlin' down the street? AbmIt's just me 'cause I lEbove to eat FAbmudge and Twinkies and deviled ham. WhAbmo's real flabby? YEbes, I Abmam! DbmEvery picture of me's gotta bAbme an aerial view. NDbmow my doctor tells me there's just Ebone thing left to do:
CHORUS 1
GrAbmapefruit Diet, (Diet!) thrAbmow out the pizza and bEbeer. GrAbmapefruit Diet, (Diet!) get those jAbmelly donuts Ebout of hAbmere. GrAbmapefruit Diet, (Diet!) it mAbmight seem a little sevEbere. GrAbmapefruit Diet, (Diet!) I'm gettin' tAbmired of my bEbig fat rAbmear.
RIFF
Blow, fatty!Abm VERSE 2 Well, I Abmused to live on chocolate sauce; MAbmade sumo wrestlers look lEbike Kate Moss. WAbmalked down an alley and I got stuck. I gAbmot more rolls than a pEbastry trAbmuck. WhDbmen I'm all done eating, I eAbmat a little more. WhDbmen I leave a room first I gEbotta grease the door.
CHORUS 2
GrAbmapefruit Diet; (Diet!) cAbman't have another eclEbair. GrAbmapefruit Diet, (Diet!) I gotta dAbmecrease my dEberriAbmere.
BREAK (I'm fairly unsure about these chords) Eb Dbm | Abm Eb | Dbm Eb | Abm I'm on a Grapefruit Diet! Eb Dbm | Abm Eb | Dbm Eb | Abm I'm on a Grapefruit Diet! Eb Dbm | Abm Eb | Dbm Eb | Abm I'm on a Grapefruit Diet! VERSE 3 (there's not really any chords here, but I think this sounds okay)
No more pAbmie now. No more creme brulee LEbay off the gravy and sAbmouffle No french frAbmi-yi-yies now. No ice cream parfait. EbMr. Cheese Nacho; stAbmay away. Oh I thDbmink I'd sell my soul for a trAbmiple patty melt, BDbmut I need a boomerang when EbI put on my belt.
CHORUS 3
GrAbmapefruit Diet, (Diet!) lAbmay off the 3 MusketEbeers. GrAbmapefruit Diet, (Diet!) until my bAbmig booty dEbisappAbmears. GrAbmapefruit Diet; (Diet!) I'll eat 'em tAbmill they're comin' out of my Ebears. GrAbmapefruit Diet, (Diet!) 'cause I hAbmaven't seen my fEbeet in yAbmears
BREAK Eb Dbm | Abm Eb | Dbm Eb | Abm I'm on a Grapefruit Diet! Eb Dbm | Abm Eb | Dbm Eb | Abm I'm on a Grapefruit Diet! Eb Dbm | Abm Eb | Dbm Eb | Abm I'm on a Grapefruit Diet! OUTRO
AbmI think I'm about ready for a quarter pounder with extra cheese. I need a side order of onion rings and oh, don't forget to super-size that.