Traditional Irish - When the old dun cow caught fire
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Some fAmriends and I in a public house
Were pGlaying a game of chance oneAm night
When inGto the Fpub a Efireman ran
His Fface all chalky Ewhite.
"Am;What's up," says Brown, "Have you seen a ghost,
Or have you sGeen your Aunt AmMariah'"
"Me AunGt MariahF be buggered!&quEot; says he,
"FThe bleedin' pub'Es on fire!"
(Chorus)
And tAmhere was Brown, upside down
LGappin' up the whiskey from the flAmoor
G"Booze, booze!&Fquot; ThEe firemen cried
As tFhey came knockin' at the Edoor (clap clap)
Oh doAmn't let 'em in till it's all drunk up
And sGomebody shouted AmMaclntyre! MACINTYRE!
And we Gall got bluFe-blind pEaralytic drunk
When the FOld Dun ECow caught Amfire.
&Amquot;Fire," says Brown, "What a bit of luck.
GEverybody followAm me
We'll go Gdown to the Fcellar, if the Efire's not there
Then we'll Fhave a grand old Espree."
So weAm went on down after good old Brown
For boozGe we could not Ammiss
And we Ghadn't been Fthere five Eminutes before
FWe were all quite Epissed.
(Repeat Chorus)
Then, AmSmith walked over to the port wine tub
And Ggave it just a few hard kAmnocks (clap clap)
He stGarted tFakin' off his Epantaloons
LikewFise his shoes and Esocks
"Am;Hold on, "says Brown, "that ain't allowed
Ye Gcanna do that in Amhere
Don't go Gwashin' Ftrotters in the Eport wine tub
When we Fgot some low carb Ebeer.
(Repeat Chorus)
And tAmhen there came to the old back door
The GVicar of our local Amchurch
And when Ghe had Fseen our Edrunken ways
He beFgan to scream and Ecurse
"Am;You drunken sods, you heathen clods
You've Gtaken to a drunken Amspree!
And you Gdrank up Fall that EBenedictine Brandy
And you Fdidn't save a drop for Eme!"
(Repeat Chorus)
And Amthen there came a mighty crash
HaGlf the bloody roof gave Amway
We were Galmost Fdrowned in the Efiremen's hose
But Fwe were gonna Estay
So we Amgot some tacks and some old wet sacks
And we Gnailed ourselves inAmside
And we Gsat there Fdrinkin' the Efinest rum
'Till Fwe was bleary-Eeyed
(Repeat Chorus)
LAmater that night when the fire was out
We Gcame up from the cellar Ambelow
Our pGub was bFurned, our Ebooze was drunk
And our Fheads were a-hangin' Elow
"AmOh look," says Brown, with a look quite queer
It seemed Gsomething caught his Amire
"WGe've gottaF get downE to Murphy's pub
It Fcloses on the Ehour!"
(Repeat Chorus)