Stephen Lynch - Whittilin man

W h i t t l i n ' M a n Had a stump to sit on; had some wood, had his trusty knife Whittled out a house, a car, and he whittled himself a wife(Such a beautiful wife!) Whittled out four kids, a swimming pool and a big leer jet And so he wouldn't miss Saved By The Bell, when he whittled a T.V. set - yeah! He'd whittle if its light, and he'd whittle if its dark And if Noah was around, well he'd whittle him an ark He'd whittle something new and he'd whittle something old He'd whittle something hot and he'd whittle something rather chilly Keep a safe distance if you can 'Cause you're never safe around Whittlin' Man Some say "Whittlin' Man's a genius", still others say "He's just dumb" He whittled off a foot, an ear, three fingers and his left thumb... Boy, is he dumb! That won't stop him, no it won't - he'll whittle through thick and thin And once he's whittled everything, he'll just whittle it all again - yeah! He'd whittle if it's white, and he'd whittle if it's black And he'd whittle on a duck 'til the duck can't quack He'd whittle if it's dry, and he'd whittle if it's juicy Whittled on Desi and he whittled on Lucy Whittled JFK and he whittled Jackie O Whittled old Larry and Curly and Moe And he whittled Frank Zappa and he whittled Tipper Gore Whittle, whittle, whittle 'til he can't no more Whittled Shamu and he'd whittle on Jaws Whittled the Easter Bunny and he whittled Santa Claus He'll whittle, whittle, whittle just fast as he can