Stephen Lynch - A history lesson
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Stephen:
I have to do the vocals for Medieval Bush.
Friends:
Why?
Stephen:
Cause I said 1570's muff instead of 1470's muff
and the medieval period ended at the beginning
of the 16th century.
Friends:
So thats 1500's.
Wait! So how do you know this?
Stephen:
Cause I used to be a teacher.
Friends:
(Laugh)You used to be a teacher?
Stephen:
Yes.
Friends:
Professor?
Stephen:
No, I taught elementary school and I got fired
because I had an unorthodox way of teaching which
is I would bring in my guitar and...
I never told you this?
Friends:
No!
Stephen:
I would bring in my guitar and I would sing the
lessons to the children.
Friends:
Of course you did.
Stephen:
I am dead serious.
Friends:
Yes.
Stephen:
I am. Alright, alright hold on I'll give you one
of the... Let me remember.
Alright here's one I remember, okay?
This is Ben Franklin.
Am C 2x
AmBen Franklin went Cout one night,
AmTied a key to the Cend of a kite,
AmElectricity sCtruck so bright,
Dm Am (-> not sure about this one)
Write it down muthafuckas
Friends:
You called the kids motherfuckers?
Stephen:
Some of them were motherfuckers, yes.
Friends:
Science
Stephen:
Ummm... okay!
AmIssac Newton sat Cunder a tree,
AmAn apple hit him in the Chead so he,
AmSaid holy shit that's Cgravity,
DmWrite it down muthafucAmkas
Stephen:
I have a million of these.
Friends:
Then why don't you do the pilgrims?
Stephen:
Okay... hey now and...
AmPilgrims raced agaCinst the clock,
AmLooking for aC place to dock,
AmThey said fuck it here's CPlymouth Rock,
DmWrite it down muthaAmfuckas.
Friends:
I don't like the fact that you are implying that the
pilgrims were lazy.
Stephen:
I'm not implying anything.
Friend:
Wright Brothers.
Oooh that's a good one.
Stephen:
Uh...
AmA dude named COrville Wright,
AmTold his bro lets Cinvent flight,
AmSo Wilbur said &quCot;ight",
DmWrite it down muthaAmfuckas
Stephen:
Yes, yes Wilbur said "ight"
Friend:
Wilbur said "ight"?
Stephen:
In my story he did.
Friend:
Wilbur was street in your story?
Stephen:
That's right.
Friend:
Word.
Stephen:
See, you can't stump me
Friend:
Slavery?
Stephen:
Uh there is nothing funny about slavery... well...
AmAbe Lincoln Clead the nation,
AmFreed slaves form Cthe plantation,
AmEmanci-mothafuckin' Cproclamation,
DmWrite it down anaAmnem-ops.
Friend:
Gandhi!
Stephen:
Uh... I did not have a Ghandi one. Uh...
Alright hold on, hold on, hold on.
Gandhi... Uh... alright.
(Slowly)
AmGandhi is Cwhat you said,
AmAn Indian with Ca bald head,
AmAnd he was a bit Cunder fed,
DmWrite is down muthaAmfuckas!
Stephen:
See?! Yeah! Fired from that job!
Friend:
Your a genius.
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I think this is correct. If you don't think it sounds right,
by all means correct me. :-)
Enjoy the song!