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Tuning: E A D G B E
[Verse 1]
FI heard there is no EmChristmas DmIn the silly Middle CEast FNo trees, no snow, no SEmanta Claus DmThey have different religious Cbeliefs DmThey believe in EmMuhammad FAnd not in our hEmoliday DmAnd so every EmDecember FI go to the Middle East and Gsay
[Chorus 1]
CHey there Mr CMuslim CMerry Fucking GChristmas GPut down that book the GKoran GAnd hear some holiday Cwishes CIn case you haven't Cnoticed CIt's Jesus's Fbirthday FSo get off your heathen GMuslim ass GAnd fucking Ccelebrate
[Verse 2]
FThere is no holiday Emseason DmIn India I've Cheard FThey don't hang up their Emstockings DmAnd that is just Cabsurd! DmThey've never read a Christmas Emstory FThey don't know what Rudolf is Emabout DmAnd that is why in EmDecember FI'll go to India and GShout
[Chorus 2]
CHey there Mr.C Hinduist CMerry Fucking GChristmas GDrink Eggnog and eat soGme beef GAnd pass it to the misCsus. CIn case you haven't Cnoticed CIt's Jesus's Fbirthday FSo get off your heathen GHindu ass GAnd fucking Ccelebrate!
[Verse 3]
FNow I heard that in JEmapan DmEveryone just lives in Csin FThey pray to several EmGods DmAnd put needles in their sCkin DmOn December Em25th FAll they do is eat a Emcake DmAnd that is why I Emgo to Japan FAnd walk around and sGay
[Chorus 3]
CHey there Mr. SChintoist CMerry Fucking GChristmas GGod is going to Gkick your ass GYou infidelic pagan Cscum. CIn case you haven't nCoticed CThere's festive things tFo do FSo lets all rejoice for JGesus GAnd Merry fucking Christmas Cto you.
FOn Christmas Day I travel 'round the Gworld and say FTaoists, Krishnas, EmBuddhists, and all you aDmtheists Ctoo, FMerry Fucking GChristmas, To CYou!