Mason Williams - The tomato vendetta

^DThis song’s about the Tomato Vendetta, ^Aand the tale of a man who let a ^DHate for tomatoes cause him strife, ^AHe lost his job, wife, home, car, kids, and life^D.

^D7He’d go downtown to buy some groceries, ^GHe went because his family was hungry, ^DHe always bought red meat and potatoes ^ABut he wouldn’t touch those ugly tomatoes^D…

^DHe didn’t know why he hated tomatoes, ^AThey were just as ugly as far as ugly goes, ^DThere in the store, when no-one was watchin’, ^AHe’d set melons on them and laugh at their squashin’^D.

^D7One night after shopping and on his way home, ^GHis loathing for tomatoes cut to the bone, ^DHe just couldn’t stand the strain any more, ^AHe vowed to destroy the Tomato Horde^D.

^DHe turned around, and viciously hopin’ ^AThe grocery stores would still be open, ^BmHis eyes grew cold, for he was a man, ^AWhose Moment of Truth lay close at hand^D.

^D7All over town, in every store, ^GTomatoes were hurt and spilled on the floor, ^DBig melons, and turkeys, and large sacks of grits, ^AWere dumped on their sections to mash them to bits^D.

^DAt the last store he finished his plan, ^ABut on his way out, a delivery van, Full of ^Dbig ripe Tomatoes drove in and hit him, ^ATomato Vendetta had claimed its victim^D.

^D7The incident of the Tomato Vendetta, ^GCaused a sensation that was something that the ^DPublic could relish, and readily snatch-up, ^APopularly known as the tomato ketchup…