Hank Green - Crime Dramas Suck

There's a ^Cplace where you don't w^Ganna be Where p^Ceople die c^Gonstantly And they n^Cever die in n^Gormal ways It's prep^Costerous but s^Gtill cliche

When your ^Cdrug dealer's aunt kills your m^Gom in a duel C NC By chopping off her head with a scythe in a pool Well the^Dy're not saying it makes sense They're ^Ejust interpreting the evidence

This is the p^Clot to every tel^Gevision crime show ^C From CSI to Columbo ^Cand I think you know what's in st^Gore The ^Cguy we met in the f^Girst fifteen minutes C NC Will come back because you know he did it ^CI don't think they're trying any^Gmore And I'm getting b^Cored

^CThere was semen all over ^Gthe crime scene So they use^C the super-fancy semen ^Gtesting machine And the ^CDNA database g^Gets a hit But it l^Cooks like he might still ^Gget away with it

But the f^Cinal piece of ev^Gidence ^CTotally stumps the b^Cad guy's defense And ^Dhe breaks down in front of everyone And ^Etells them exactly how it was done

This is the p^Clot to every tel^Gevision crime show ^C From CSI to Columbo ^Cand I think you know what's in st^Gore The ^Cguy we met in the f^Girst fifteen minutes C NC Will come back because you know he did it ^CI don't think they're trying any^Gmore And I'm getting b^Cored

By the m^Ciddle of the^G first season ^CMurder is eclipsed by se^Gxual tension And I gu^Cess that probably happ^Gens a lot Since cr^Cime-solving people are alw^Gays so hot

But then a ^Cserial killer ki^Gdnaps the girl And they pr^Comise to save her if it co^Csts them the world And they fi^Dnd her two seconds before she dies And they hu^Eg and they laugh and they screw and they cry

This is the p^Clot to every tel^Gevision crime show ^C From CSI to Columbo ^Cand I think you know what's in st^Gore The ^Cguy we met in the f^Girst fifteen minutes C NC Will come back because you know he did it ^CI don't think they're trying any^Gmore And I'm getting b^Cored *End on C*