Tuning: E A D G B E

[Intro] C E F D7 G C E F D7 G

In the ^Croom with the sloping roof ^EIn your director’s chair You ^Ftalk with your hands About ^D7what you will ^Gdo next year.

But ^Cno-one gives a toss And we ^Eall go to Europe Watch ^FAlwin Schockemöhle Where’^D7er he com^Gpetes.

Do^Freen,^Bb Do^Freen ^Bb Do^Freen,^Bb Do^Freen.^Bb

The ^Crecreation ground by ^Eus Don’t seem to have Ma^Fny facilities For the ^D7kids and the ^Gdogs.

I sub^Cmitted a poem To the ^Ecouncil chambers But they ^Fjust looked surprised Like the ^D7front of an ^GAnglia.

There are ^Cno dark corners of ^Ecool relief It’s a ^Ftragedy with few ^D7inter^Gludes.

Do^Freen,^Bb Do^Freen ^Bb Do^Freen,^Bb Do^Freen.^Bb

[Instrumental] C E F D7 G (repeat x4)

The ^Cfive-day breaks And the l^Eong weekends Give me ^Fplenty of time To see the ^D7everyday ^Gthings.

I was ^Cfaintly amused to see ^EDutch veterans Alquin ^FFooling around On pleasure ^D7craft at ^GChester.

^CWalking up Scafell ^ESwinging a chain A^Flong came a hosteller I ^D7asked him his ^Gname.

When he ^Csaid he was Malcolm Of ^EArimathea My ^Frejoinder was “Die, You off-beat ^D7cabaret ^Gtype.”

Do^Freen,^Bb Dor^Feen ^Bb Do^Freen,^Bb Dor^Feen.^Bb

[Instrumental] C E F D7 G (repeat x4)

Do^Freen,^Bb Do^Freen ^Bb Do^Freen,^Bb Do^Freen.^Bb (repeat to fade)

Half Man Half Biscuit - Doreen