Garfunkel and Oates - 5050

^CClose your eyes, m^C7ake a wish, ^Fmaj7picture your perfect w^Goman Now o^Cpen your eyes and f^C7orget about her cause I’m he^Fmaj7re and I’m not i^Gt And bef^Fmaj7ore we go any further There’s a fe^Gw things I’d like to admit

I’m a ^Amself-absorbed workaholic My mind is always divi^Dded My sch^Amedule is erratic, just like my thoughts I’m ea^Dsily depressed or overly excited whoo!

I^Am can’t do anything around the house If y^Dou want food you gotta cook it yourself And if we st^Fmaj7op having sex, I will leave I^G have friends that give me everything else

I’ve got go^Amals and dreams and aspirations I^D’ve got shit to do I’^Fmaj7m not gonna change all my plans ^GJust to be with you

Yeah we’re a p^Eerfect couple If you’re totally comfortable b^Fmaj7eing alone We’ll al^Eways be together If it’s c^Fmaj7ool that I’m never home If you like ov^Eercompensation for boundless insecurity This is wh^Fmaj7ere it’s at And if you n^Dotice I’ve been talking about myself this whole time Well, g^Get ready for more of that

And I’m like lo^Amok at me look at me watch me watch me ^AmListen to me listen to this what do you think ^AmTell me the truth compliments only ple^Gase

N.C.

Oh man you really get me

^CI’m gonna make your dreams come true ^Fmaj7As long as they don’t interf^Gere with mine ^CI’ll always be here for you For me^Fmaj7thodically allotted a^Gmounts of time ^EmI’ll be there to^Am hold your hand If I ha^Dppen to be in town And a^Fmaj7ny time you need me There’s a 50^G/50 chance I’ll ^Cbe ^Fmaj7around ^G

^AmI know this all sounds bad But you kn^Emow what else is true Ev^Fmaj7ery word that I just said Could hav^Ge also been describing you Yes every^Fmaj7 word that I just said C^Gould have also been describing^C y^Fmaj7ou ^G

^AmYou just don’t feel bad about it ^DIt’s never even occurred to you ^AmTo not go after all the things ^DYou’ve ever wanted to ^AmYou weren’t subconsciously conditioned ^DTo give up your dreams for me Or that^Fmaj7 loved and ambitious Were^G mutually exclusive things to be

^EIt probably didn’t cross your mind That ^Fmaj7your mom had goals too That had ^Enothing to do with getting married And n^Fmaj7othing to do with having you ^ECan we stop pretending That i^Fmaj7t isn’t kind of sad That^D your mom never pursued anything With the ^Gsame intensity as your dad

^AmAnd right now you’re thinking ^GNot my mom, that was her decision ^Fmaj7Okay, sure, but all our moms ^GThat’s what they all envisioned...

^CI’m gonna make your dreams come true ^Fmaj7As long as they don’t inte^Grfere with mine ^CI’ll always be here for you ^Fmaj7For methodically allotted amo^Gunts of time ^EmI’ll be there to ^Amhold your hand ^DIf I happen to be in town ^Fmaj7And any time you need me ^GThere’s a 50/50 chance I’ll b^Ce ^Fmaj7around^G

^AmLook I’ll meet you halfway there ^DBut I can’t give you more than that ^AmAnd know it’s not as sweet of a deal ^DAs every man ever before you had

^Fmaj7All I want^E is 50/50 ^Fmaj7All I want is half ^DAnd if those numbers seem off to you ^GWhy?

^CIt doesn’t mean I won’t be your partner ^C7It doesn’t mean I won’t come through ^Fmaj7It doesn’t mean I’m a bad person ^GIt just means I’m the same as you

^CSo if you’re looking for an equal ^C7you found it ^Fmaj7But if want someone better than you, ^Gtry again ^Fmaj7Cause I only have what it takes to^G be man ^Fmaj7I’ve never had what it^G takes to be a w^Coman