Beer Softened Stool - White trash christmas

Intro is a country riff played on ^GCD Riff 1 -|---------------------------------------------------| -|---------------------------------------------------| -|---------------------------------------------------| -|--5--5--x--5--5--x--5--5--x--3--4--5---------------| -|--5--5--x--5--5--x--5--5--x--3--4--5---------------| -|--3--3--x--3--3--x--3--3--x--1--2--3---------------|

^GBaby I'm dreamin' of a ^Fwhite trash ^A# Cristmas ^GMy trailers double wide ^F so Santa can't ^F# miss it ^GBaby I'm dreamin' of a ^Fwhite trash ^A# Christmas [hold] I cant' afford no presents this [Riff 1] year!

chorus 1

^C My little boy junior he's a cotten-eyed-Joe ^G he sits on the front porch strummin' his banjo ^C my daughters always bitchin' after I take her to bed ^D that I gotta pay for the pregnancy test! ^C I'm countin' on you Santa and I hope you can hear ^G please dontcha' skip my trailer this year. (riff 1)

^GBaby I'm dreamin' of a ^Fwhite trash ^A# Cristmas ^GI'm asking you Santa to ^Fplease ^F#forgive us ^GBaby I'm dreamin' of a ^Fwhite trash ^A# Cristmas [hold] I made him squeal like a pig last [riff 1] year!

chorus 2

^C my wife's got a tattoo of Elvis on her ass ^G She used to be skinny now she looks like Mama Cass ^C her butt is lots bigger than a when she was young ^D Now her Elvis tattoo looks like Elton JOhn! ^C I'm countin' on you Santa and I hope you can hear ^G please dontcha' skip my trailer this year.(riff 1)